to actually have a plan developing in my mind, that is unprecedented. but... not knowing quite how to talk anymore, i will just 'do it.'
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yo cryptic whatever! not in the way i used to be cryptic. non sequiturs + chiasmus (omg manoj, love you!) + OCDetails disorder. i can't believe it but it's true. i don't like how i'm writing now because i recognize this style everywhere. you could make a font out of it and it is called apres-vie blog monotype. this, this is just too blank for me to do anything with and lately i make too many mistakes in typing, speaking, even the ostensibly error-free realm of my body language seems kinky taut wrong. not badly but apparently incomprehensibly. this past week, i sleep so much and wake up and walk around still wholly sleepy and delirious. when i finally ask questions they are the wrong questions and i'm left with a burnt mouth and hollow eyes and still alone with my questions. teehee...most tellingly, my CD player has this like dynasty of belle and sebastian tracks running through it. certain lyrics = me rendered happy and tolerant of situation, next bit of lyrics = wait what?! keeps me wary at least :^) sitting at my desk, the scene outside is sometimes sunny and sometimes it is dark. why is it too much to appreciate?

what i was talking before about was my schedule for next semester, in one part, and how i try to comport myself with certain people, for another part. and hopefully how those bits ['pieces' if you will :^P] ought to make sense together. to be sane, stoic, and a whole string of other adjectives that begin with the letter s. forril. and to watch more m/2 because it gives me this like inordinate obscene pleasure to like the next biggest cool shaggy ironic thing. [the s-trokes and to a faaar lesser extent shakira!] i'm so obsessed with these few sentences [haha, and b&s lyrics, sadly enough] which string through my head these days for lack of anything else. these, my new mantras. from my burnt mouth. oh my questions. maybe it is best to forget questions as a form of expression entirely. maybe it is best to forget self-expression entirely. kundera- self-negation as a form of self-expression. as if...it's back to silence again... ok? right? the smartass thing to say about flowers in the window is that they're outside. :^) and like, sometimes the limiting reagent is cold.
Joanne YunComment