how do you know when something good is going to happen?

yes, listening to archival pizzicato 5 can help you get to it.
yes, wearing a pistachio colored lacoste polo can help you get to it.

but watching as something good happens to you- is something good really happening?
but when something good happens which is also something bad- can we talk about the superposition of waves?

my brain is bloody and bruised from exertion- all i can think of, when i try to focus on the deep emotional issues that rock my world, is the word "omelette". and a mental image of an omelette, obviously. perhaps that's an exaggeration. but the -mindcollapse- which has plagued these last summer months has settled into a synapse and stuck. clogging of the arteries, my eye! take this fricking hippocampus out out out. then maybe i can rest. then maybe i will become less of a verbal fucking dilettante and when i have something to say it's not about "lifestyles". maybe i will become someone who doesn't have to apologize for her natural rest state of unexcitement. as well as the superexcited photon state.

we were speaking of immaturity, i believe. and how i feel like an artesian well of it. i don't really know what an artesian well is, but whateva. i imagine they're not chlorinated. oh, now i'm faciliating the mindcollapse via the usual routes. dilettantism, i said.

what would it be like if all the words which fell with great assurance from my mouth (hmm an allusion fault line) were true and relevant. a truthspeaker vs a loudspeaker shall we say again.

just to roadblock this current issue let me annotate a bit.

deneuver: the current state of apathy/wellwishing is just outward bound defense mechanism
deneuver: ?
nikivilla: hm
nikivilla: that sounds way too logical
nikivilla: i like it
deneuver: yeah i agree
deneuver: shush
deneuver: noo
deneuver: and yet

Purplecloud: i can understand that i guess...
Purplecloud: so it's not moral qualms, just the rejection deal
deneuver: both, definitely
Purplecloud: i empathize
Purplecloud: i'm thinking he was def. puttin up the front and jealous as hell
deneuver: a distinct possibility
Purplecloud: if you'd known ***** was genuinely upset at you for it, would it have changed what you did at all?

thanks for eavesdropping.
Joanne YunComment